How Sport Psychology has changed me

I have made many choices in the past five years that has led me to the decision of pursuing a master’s degree Kinesiology focuses on Sport Psychology. The first decision was to pursue my bachelor’s at Indiana University and to play collegiate golf. I thought as long as I work hard professional career will be in my grasp after 4 years. During the past three years, I faced difficulties that I could not even imagine, and these difficulties really made me examine and reflect on myself and my intentions during this journey. After struggling academically and not performing up to standards on the golf course, I realized that I was trying to live up to other’s expectations but not my own.

Then COVID seemed like adding another to the list of things I was struggling with at the time. Nevertheless, I took that opportunity of time to figure out what was going on, which led me to work with my sport psychologist. This is where I found out the hard truth about myself that I am a people pleaser, who not only was doing everything for the wrong reason, but also possibly pursuing a dream that was not mine. After many sessions with my sport psychologist, which was filled with tears, but also actions towards figuring things out, I was able to find my real self. I made a promise myself since then, I would do things to make myself proud, to keep promises to myself, and to love myself first before others. I made it to the Dean’s list the next semester with a 3.88 GPA, the highest I have had all four years, and also been able to drop my scoring average by 5 strokes on the golf course.

Things started to shift, I was able to overcome all the guilt of not reaching other people’s expectation and was able to admit my mistakes and own my actions. Instead of sitting and sulking at the airport, since I was not able to go home and be with my family during the pandemic, I seek for an internship at International Junior Golf Academy (IJGA). During my internship, I was able to help other junior golfers who were struggling and mentored them. That’s where I learned that being myself and sharing my story can inspire others the same. To this day, I still take one step at a time each day to continue to work on myself, to be able to be myself, own my decisions, take back control of my life and encourage others to do the same.